how guilt becomes courage


“I need to figure out how to make a more revenue and more consistent income because I want my family to feel more secure.”

Jeremey was feeling guilty about not doing enough to generate more revenue, and ultimately, more income for his family.

When we went inside to learn about this part of him, Jeremey found a tight orange ball in his solar plexus.

Almost immediately, a different part that felt very resentful toward this guilt swelled up, but we were able to get that one to step back and give us space to get to know The Guilt.

Then, there was another part that was very afraid of feeling guilty. But we were able to make it clear that our goal is to be with-not-in The Guilt, and so the feeling of guilt won’t overwhelm Jeremey. The Fear relaxed back, and the orange ball got brighter.

After that, Jeremey was able to be purely curious and connect directly with The Guilt. We learned that The Guilt thought that he was still 17, when he first became a father. And we got more clarity about everything that happened during the early years of being a parent while also still being a kid. The Guilt said things like, “You did this to yourself” and, “You won’t grow if I don’t make you feel guilty.”

But, we also discovered a lot of things that were going on with Jeremey’s parents and their own decisions about money and businesses that felt very unstable to him at that time. When we asked, “How much of the guilt belongs to me, and how much belongs to my parents?” the orange ball started flashing and strobing.

Jeremey was able to give about 50% of the guilt back to his parents because it felt very clear that much of it didn’t even belong to him and wasn't his to carry. Then he invited Courage and a purely-positive sense of Responsibility into the new available space.

During our next session, Jeremey discovered the orange ball was worried about releasing the other 50% of guilt entirely, because, “What if Courage needs me?” But Courage was able to show The Guilt that it does not actually need to feel guilty to be courageous.

The Guilt was worried about not being needed anymore. But we helped them understand that we are not destroying The Guilt, rather we are releasing the belief that “guilt is necessary to prevent you from slowing down and getting complacent." And we showed how Courage is filling up all that space to be able to help Jeremey do what he wanted to do all along: create security for our family.


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If these stories resonate with you, and you would like hire a guide to help you discover and work with your own unique parts, I am waiting for your call.

Until next time,

Thomas Knoll

Founder, YourSecondCall.com


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Self Healing Leadership

I guide leaders facing big transitions into a space where they can face their fears and transform their teams. The Self Healing Leadership newsletter gives you the ability to see, hear, and feel what it is like to go inside and do this transformative work.

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